A journey in learning as you go and knowing that there is no right answer.
01
You’re glowing.
Or… what I would call my internal flame because I’m hot (all the time!), there’s a child growing inside my body and I got pregnant at 37 and my body just isn’t what it used to be.
02
You’re eating for two now.
Or…it’s okay that you are putting on a few pounds, it’s all baby right now!?
03
Will you be breastfeeding?
Or… I really hope you are breastfeeding because it is what is best for them, and you have to.
04
Will you be co-sleeping with the baby?
Or…. you are definitely going to roll on top of your baby and suffocate them if you even consider co-sleeping.
05
Did you make your birth plan yet?
Or… let me tell you all about my birth plan and how you should plan everything the way I did.
06
Will you be accepting visitors?
Or… I should be allowed to visit but you really have to be careful of germs and shouldn’t allow too people around too soon.
I feel like everyone has their own stories of some sort that relate to interrogation of pregnancy. Whether it be your mother, your mother-in-law or that friend that just had her baby and has to tell you the correct way to do everything.
For me the judgment was all in my head, I didn’t have all the answers and didn’t realize that was okay. The lady in the cafe at my job asked me on multiple occasions if I was sure I was only having one baby (yes, yes, I am, thanks for clarifying that yet again). When the hospital asked if I had my birth plan read, I told yes, I would like to have a healthy baby. Breastfeeding was not a natural feeling for me, so my decision was that comfort and health was of the utmost for all involved. I tried, it didn’t work for us, and I have a very healthy 6- year-old who was given formula all but the first month of her life. As for visitors, only immediate family at the hospital, just my husband and I in the delivery room and anyone could come to our home and use as much hand sanitizer as they felt needed to be applied.
The truth is I didn’t really listen to anyone but myself. I was the oldest of all my siblings and cousins. Had baby-sitting jobs constantly as a teenager. I knew how to take care of a baby. The actual “challenge” of being the parent is deciding how to raise your kids. But that all has to come from within you, whether you are “breaking the cycle” or feel you had that absolute perfect childhood and want to recreate that for your child. You are the one and only person (you can let your spouse have input too I suppose) that can answer the questions for you and your baby.